my year end roundup time (:

this has been one interesting year. eventful to say the least. it passed so fast. especially without school to put a timeline on it all for most of the year. starting from the beginning, end of As. working for my dad (good money, but torturous). a-level results, which i'm still so so grateful and thankful for. rj dance night. alumni item. and then there was sentio (:

i'm really happy i got to use dance which means the world to me, to help others. we raised thirty-something thousand in the end. but the path to that was not easy, good or very happy. i was and still am incredibly happy i did it. and the chance to perform again with my beloved dancers. but this concert wrecked alot of my friendships. which makes my heart ache to this day. maybe it brought the ugly side out of everyone, the stress and it all. i never expected all that..

i traveled alot this year. i love traveling. i'm an escapist at heart. always have been. always will be. i love other cultures and languages too (: if i could spend the rest of my life wandering around the world, like my 2nd aunt. i'd be a very very happy person. hongkong (with stef, cass & rachel), japan (osaka & kyoto with mummy. i've fallen head over heels in love with japan), new zealand (mummy, 2 kookoo, 4 kookoo & daniel), and then paris (hongmin, angela & nicole). they were 4 wonderful trips. very very different. in hongkong it was all about the food shopping & company. japan was culture, shopping, food and mother-daughter bonding time. new zealand was aunts & niece bonding time, nature and alot of thinking. paris was just a mad rush to see everything and do everything :D disneylandddd. hahaha.

and the biggest of them all (: lse. london. i've been loving london. the first few weeks were incredibly hard. lonely and sad. and it was definitely very unexpected, or rather different from what i expected. but after awhile, everything just fell in place. and i really call my little pigeon-hole home now. singapore will always be the best, but london is a whole new wonderful experience. i'm so so grateful to the singaporeans in lse. they're a fantastic bunch. e holborn boys, e singsoc exco and all the rest (: thursdays afternoons (that 2 hours) brings such warmth to my heart (((: and then there's angela who's been an absolute darling, my baby (grins, i'm her mummy). haha. i wouldn't be able to function without her i tell you. shimoni, my floormate, my comrade in battle. smirks. kaylene, alex and jess who make me want to go to class. haha. charlotte & ayla (((: my adorable french-rambling girls. plus all the insane crazy girls in holborn. haha.

i don't know if i changed, the way i view things changed, or you changed. suddenly things seem so clear. and i was able to stop myself before doing anything stupid. which is always good (: i'm glad i got all that worked out before the new year. so i get to start the new year on a fresh clean page. no more attachments to the past anymore. i'm definitely walking on now.

friends. old friends. screw still makes me so happy in incomparable ways. nothing can really fully convey how happy i am that there is still hope. and i don't think anyone can ever understand how happy a jpeg letter and a small card can make me. all i want to say here is thank you. the past 2 weeks. spending time with members of screw has been absolute love. we find laughter and happiness in the smallest insignificant things or most unlikely things. like getting lost at night in the west, which actually kept me smiling the whole night. haha.

mel. who i miss so so dearly. who's so far away in michigan. there's just a gaping hole which only you can fill. i really wish i could be next to you. especially during the times when you're sad. i wish i could always protect my dear sister. you're the sister i always (as an only child) wished i had. i love you darling.

its funny how its the boys, especially anwar and yipeng who email me or msn me the most. haha. being overseas, seeing the behaviour of some, makes me appreciate and love my 3 best guy friends (including justin) the most (((: and also funny how being in london, ends up making me closer to my friends in e us. haha. like jerrine, dione & wanlin. grins.

2008 new year resolutions

- eat less crisps & chips

- SAVE SOME BLOODY MONEY

- get a calling card so i don't bust my hp bills again -.-

- drink less

and on a more serious note (probably the ones i'm going to pay more attention to & try to keep)

- dance. my body and heart is desperately needing some comfort

- treat my body better

- keep up my zen attitude

- lock my heart up abit more

- study harder

- maintain all current friendships

- not to take the same path i just stepped off again

on a sidenote, do watch across the universe (: its beatles loveeeeeee.

: all you need is love :: beatles :

mingkie-poo (: the love of my life.

anwar looking all smart in his no.2. hahaha. i'm learning :p i adore this picture.

rj girls at e comm ball. zanetta, jing qin, xiaohui, licia, shanru & i.

STEFFISH (((: in e back of rachel's suzie. haha.

yipeng outside mambo. haha.

hamster twin kory!

jing qin! see my red dress :D i heart it!

i'm getting really good at letting go. haha. i must say i've been forced to practice this quite abit this year. and before i get all weepy about my year (-.-) i shall just focus on happy times for now. haha. and leave e recounting for next week. grins.

the past few days have been exhausting, but extremely extremely fun and good for my heart (: i'm still jet-lagged. but its worth it. so so worth it. especially seeing how i might not come back in easter cos i definitely can't study back here -.-

got a haircut. my fringe is bloody short now -.- haha.

it hasn't particularly felt very chrismas-y this year , though i just claimed my xmas present from my daddy :D:D:D:D ANGIEEE! i got e flats. hehehee. i love being home, and being with my family and all that. but i really feel really displaced from everything. its like i really call london home now. but i could never live there forever. haha.

i miss jie ): xmas isn't xmas without jie. and its e 2nd xmas in a row we won't be spending xmas together. sighs.

enchanted was loveeeeeee. patrick dempsey can be my prince anyday ((((: haha. true love kiss. the irony of it all that my little fantasy fell apart during it. smirks.

these few pictures for now. haha. got more i haven't uploaded :p

: because of you :: ne-yo :

i think i'm finally seeing people and things for what and who they really are. and its lifted that huge load of my shoulders.

thank god i finally woke up.

haha. i never really saw how much london has changed me till i came back to spore. and seeing everything and everyone. hahaha. but i think its a good change (:

mambo tonight was funnn (: hahaha. wheeeee. (cass is so going to kill me. grins)

till tmr!

oh gosh, it feels so good to be home (:

seeing all e familiar faces. (((: hahaha.

more tmr, i'm dead tired. just got back from anwar's comm ball. nights!

i'm going to stop spending so much money next year (: save up for my lent term trip. and stop buying stuff. i'm going to live off presents. so there.

3 more days and i'm back home (:

i need to put my world in order again. its going to be the hardest thing i've ever done, but it has to be done.

i've never been so ok with being alone. and yet i've never felt more alone.

i suppose that's an improvement

i miss my angela puppy alr ):

i feel like such a fool sometimes. hah. after all the shit, after the numerous let-downs, after the million and one times of saying goodbye. here i am, being the idiot again.

i'm tired. i really am.

hello my old friend. the (very long very expensive) phonecall was (((: well i'm not happy about the situations we are in, but happy that you called me. or rather got me to phone you. hurhur. role reversal was fun (smirks), but kinda put me off balance. so GET HAPPY ALRIGHT! the whiner and emo role is MINEEEE so stick to yours. hrmmphs. haha. i'll be back soon (: so we can both whine and bitch then. i heart you old friend!

this is going to be one very very long post. alot of things rolling through my mind these few days. so i just have this need to put it down somewhere. before i forget. haha, i'm using my blog to keep track of my days and events, that one day i'll look back upon.

talking to the old friend yesterday, got me thinking alot. seeing as how i spent the whole night attempting to write my ils essay - i had alot of time to think. hahaha. but at least i finished my ils :D so now i'm attempting to start my xmas essays. grins. i'm such a mugger toad. mehehe.

my fingers are swollen. they're even fatter and stumpier than normal. brilliant.

i miss screw so badly ):

talking to the old friend about how some in singapore, feel so removed from the lives of those overseas, and how we overseas seem to be continuously moving ahead with our lives here, and leaving them behind. but its quite the same feeling for me here. when i read the entries of my friends' blogs who are in spore or us, i feel like they're moving on from what we shared in the past as well. and i sometimes do worry that when i go back to spore, we'd have moved so far apart from each other that we no longer are able to relate towards each other. if that happens one day, then there'd be nothing to pull me back to spore anymore. its the people who make me want to go back. no matter how much i enjoy myself here, and love it here. its the people back home that makes this part of me permanently aching to go home.

but i can't fault my friends for moving on. i have no right, or the ability to expect them to put their lives on pause, so that i can go back to what we had before i left. because i am moving on (albeit bit by bit) here. and i am growing and changing as a person. so its just me learning to accept changes back home, and learning how to assimilate to major changes on both sides of my world. london and singapore.

sighs. i skipped public law lecture again -.- i'm horrid. SHIT i need to really catch up on public law and turn up for public law lectures. damnit. i hate public law, but according to cheryl, one lecture costs an average of 40 bloody pounds. so i better turn up -.- SHIT I'M VERY POOR. roars! not cos of classes -.- but cos of shopping. grumbles. but i'm in a happy xmas mood alr so i don't feel particularly keen about studying or sch. ahaha.

i hope my wish finally comes through for xmas.

even though i keep whining about wanting to go home. i'll miss my friends here so much )): its really different staying in a dorm in a foreign country as opposed to going to sch from home everyday. its like we (in e dorm) are each other's family. anything big or small is shared and spent with them (: its like i can spend up to 10/12 hours with angela a day. haha. so its going to be a month without all of them 0_o interesting.

i'm really quite proud of myself (: haha. everyone always says i'm such a spoilt brat, but i've cooked for myself (and for ppl), washed all my own clothes, cleaned my room, studied and more in the past few months. hahaha. so yay for me (: i really feel the last 2 months have had such a huge impact on me. i think my perspective towards life has changed alot. i'm all about living in the moment now. haha. i think london has given me wayyy more guts if anything. i've stopped considering what ifs what ifs. and just do stuff. heh.

this has been one very long entry :p verbal diarrhoea i tell you. last bit (: doubt i'll have much time to blog more this week. angela's leaving on weds, so tmr is all angela day. kal's coming tmr night, so its alot of time with kal and e lse ppl before i leave..

haven't done one of these in awhile.

THREE NAMES THAT FRIENDS CALL YOU: wj, miss seow, wan (only nee calls me this -.-)

THREE MOST IMPORTANT DATES IN YOUR LIFE: 28oct, 24dec, xxjune

THREE THINGS YOU'VE DONE IN THE LAST 33 MINUTES: went to the post office, shopping, ate a hummingbird cafe cupcake

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE BOOKS: shopaholic, marie antoinette, vogue (ahahaha)

THREE WAYS TO BE HAPPY: screw, interdependent, mel (:

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE SONGS AS OF NOW: blind - lifehouse, hanging by the moment - lifehouse, ai de jiu shi ni - wang lee hom

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX: hands, eyes, height

THREE PEOPLE YOU MISS FROM YOUR PAST: kelvin, valerie, alton

THREE GIFTS YOU WOULD LIKE TO RECEIVE: my wish, shoes, holga

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE HOBBIES: dancing, cooking, shopping

THREE PLACES YOU WANNA GO FOR HOLIDAY: italy, korea, japan

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE CARTOON CHARACTERS: winx, hawk girl, rogue

THREE GIRLS'/BOYS' NAMES: connor, caitlin, chloe

THREE MALLS THAT YOU USUALLY GO TO: harrods, topshop, selfridges

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE FASTFOODS: mos, subway, pret

THREE SCHOOLS YOU'VE ATTENDED: rgs ((((: rjc, lse

THREE FAVOURITE DRINKS: b52, champagne, diet coke

THREE THINGS FOUND IN YOUR BAG: camera, lipgloss, hp

THREE PERFUMES/COLOGNES: stella mccartney stella, gucci eau de parfum II, bond no 5 chinatown

THREE FAVOURITE COLOURS: black, pink, yellow

THREE EVENTS YOU'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO: going home, anwar's comm ball, christmas (:

i shall attempt to leave this at the top of my blog for as long as possible. so you can see this :p

hello my old friend. the (very long very expensive) phonecall was (((: well i'm not happy about the situations we are in, but happy that you called me. or rather got me to phone you. hurhur. role reversal was fun (smirks), but kinda put me off balance. so GET HAPPY ALRIGHT! the whiner and emo role is MINEEEE so stick to yours. hrmmphs. haha. i'll be back soon (: so we can both whine and bitch then. i heart you old friend!

okkk (: very belated paris peekchures!

acting cute at e airport (:

4 lovely ladies. hehehee. at e charles de gaulle airport in paris (: freezing ass cold

our hotel room!

angela & i, by candlelight.

PROFITEROLES :D i loveeeeeeeeee.

foie gras terrine. omg. this is love i tell you.

outside our restaurant!

the patisserie outside our hotel (: yum yummmm

my very own puffing chimney. smirks.
angela, nicole, me, hongmin in front of the arc de triomphe (: so pretty! (e arch)

arc de triomphe. black and white. i love.
eiffel tower ((((: i think its absolutely gorgeous. i've got a mini one sitting on my table now (:
close up of e eiffel tower!

me passing by the eiffel tower (: in the open top tour bus.

erh some parisian symbolic place (y) hehhh.

the obelisk and ferris wheel at e end of champs elysees

us 4 in lafayette. omg. we went absolutely bonkers in there. 3 of us left with lv bags. ahahaha. its hilarious. i likey lafayette (:
the other side of paris (:
hong min & i with our shopping & the sponge bob is for angela who's bloody obsessed with it -.-

the sunset in paris (: gorgeous. this was from e taxi hong min and i were in. hehehe.

at night in front of e arc de triomphe. wheee.
champs elysees. crazy no of ppl. but not THAT great shopping -.-
champs elysees :D
dinner that night. omg it was goood. duck breast, thigh and liver. on potato gratin. yum yum.

e 4 crazy girls in paris disneyland. hehehee. it was pouring monkeys that day. so we all had to get one disney poncho. we looked like yellow ducks waddling about. smirks.

my two standbymes (:

fulfilling my dream of being a princess. haha.

princess castle!!! :D

hongmin :D

ok. that's it for now (: off to watch heroes!

fuck. i'm staring at my darbyshire journals on the bloody jury system. and all i can think about is going back to singapore. going back to all of you. grumbles. this is not getting me anywhere. i wanted to finish my ils essay today, or rather this morning so i can go grocery shopping at chinatown for a good dinner with my holborn boys tmr (: and also attempt to start my xmas essays. so i can spend more time with my darlings back in spore.

i think i finally have the strength, space and heart to really be an adult about matters. and this time, when i go back. its time to put a full stop to everything. and let a new chapter begin

hmms. just a few random things i feel like writing down.

- i'm eating more rubbish & junk food than i have in like ever, or at least 6 years. my diet's gone wayyyy out of e door, i spend days eating like a cow, and days not eating at all. and i'm losing weight. this is bloody ridiculous.

- i'm missing spore not cos i'm not liking it here. in fact i love it here. i love it that i can go days without seeing the sun (: i love the accents. i love the ppl here. i love my room. its my little hole, where i put up everything myself. and i've been keeping it clean, neat and in good condition. all by myself for the first time in my life. and damnit, i'm incredibly proud of it ok.

- i'm incredibly attached to the holborn boys. hmms. they sound like my very own boyband. hahaha. but i don't think they're prepared for my madness. haha.

- 3 girls have been responsible for keeping me sane all this time. angela, hongmin & shib (: my loves.

- i love love love my singsoc exco (: thursday meetings are e highlights of my thursdays. hahaha.

- as much as public law & ils pisses me off, i love law. it just feels right. haha.

- i love having angie around (: she came down today. and for those few hours, everything felt like home. there's no need to explain anything. she knows everything. hahaha. my sunshine (:

- i think i'm going to have disgusting phone bills. calling mel & ming all e time. oops.

- i'm spending wayyyy too much money. i need to cut down in lent term. plus i'll do all my shopping in spore with my mummy :p so no more shopping here. for awhile. heh.

- i can't wait for lent term law reading week. then angela and i can go off somewhere happy happy.

- i can drop into this decent brit accent quite naturally nowadays. hahaha. ming told me she'd slap me. hehh.

- i miss taka ):

- i've been staring at my photos from my 18th bday party and those from just before i left. i think i grew fatter & uglier. brilliant -.- maybe its the hair.

- speaking of which, i need to cut my hair when i go back.

8 more days!!!! -bounces about-

happy birthday mel darling (: you're the absolute love of my life. i hope you had a great night. winkwink. hehehee.

off to really try and mug/swot. brit slang is hilarious i tell you. things like daft, knob, fit, swot, wolly and knackered. grins. oh yes, if u can decipher my han yu pin yin: ying1 guo2 ren2 zhen1 de4 bu2 hui4 suan4 shu4. ta1 men2 lian2 shi2 er4 jia1 shi2 ba1 ye3 yao4 xiang3 hen2 jiu3 hen2 jiu3. rang2 hou4 shou1, ze4 ge4 tai4 nan2 le4 -.- mei3 ci4 qu4 chi1 fan4 shi2, suan4 zhang4 shi2, yi2 ding4 yao4 suan4 shang4 wu3 fen1 zhong1 de4. smirks. if u understand, do tell me (: and i'll applaud ur chi. ahahaha.

lunch with chongs & angie today was wonderful (: felt so surreal. but so good. hehehee.

:bu neng shuo de mi mi:: jay chou :

shit. its 4 am. i'm still awake. angie's coming at 10. and i didn't even get through one journal for my reading tonight. damnit. i need to get these journals & kate malleson done by tmr night. so i can do my ils essay on sunday. and if i get enough time, start on contract. grumbles.

e following part, i think only deb & mel will get :p

dark and twisty

forever young

drowning

i seriously have no idea why i love to blog so much. i've been bloggin since i was what, 13? i even blog when i'm drunk. hah.

i feel like i'm showing this side of myself that i never even knew existed. i'd be disgusted with myself, much less other people. great way to make friends.

episode 7. naming the 5 things only you know about me.. oh god. i miss mel, interdependent and screw so much. these are the ppl who will take everything bad about me, and never judge. i just called ming. all i had to say was two sentences, and she immediately knew smthing was up.

emo emo.

i wish i could blame it on pms -.-

fuck, its howling outside my window.

bad bad mood.

thank god angie's coming down on sat. i need my sunshine to brighten my day.

omg. the months without grey's have been an absolute torture. i'm happily going through the 4th season now (((: the monologue at the end of every bloody episode just voices out everything. haha. it makes all the emotions roll over me like waves. hah. i rmb how deb and i used to gush and bitch about grey's ): i miss you debbb.

episode 6. learning to let go. can i let go? haha. the question has been going round and round for years. i'd thought by now, i'd have gotten tired of thinking about that question, tired of getting hurt and all that. sadist i am.

i'm actually pretty looking forward to going with cass for mambo when i get back :p ahaha. i've never clubbed with seto before. tis going to be interesting. grins.

i need an anchor desperately.

suddenly everyone seems to be frog-leaping into a whole different level from what i've been used to. its expected, yet still shocking. it feels like i'm standing from afar looking on, but its not like i want to be on that level. i just wish i had the way up. hah. i'm not making sense again.

i can't wait for angie, kaleni & singapore. all in that order (:

okkk. alot of pictures coming up. heh. i think i'll do se7en first cos its so fresh in my mind :p paris will be tmr k. once i recover abit more. hahaha.

anyway, singsoc co-organised se7en with mss (malaysian spore soc), and i was the organiser on e singsoc side. it was an absolute blast i tell you ((((: ahahaha, i haven't had so much fun clubbing in ages. i think partly was cos there were alot of ppl there whom i knew, so i just floated from group of ppl to group of ppl. hehh. then cos we had to hit a minimum bar spend, so basically all e exco were doing was getting ppl to drink. so to get ppl to drink, i had to drink :p which resulted in me drinking like at least half a bottle of champagne (i bought 2 bottles), 6 shots of b52 and goodness knows what, a couple of beers, quite abit of whisky & rum & more champagne i think. i was super super gone by e middle of e night. ahahaha. and everytime wan jun gets drunk like that, interesting things happen eh.

e theme for e night was e 7 deadly sins :D ahaha. i was wrath. hence e red dress & black makeup. I EVEN WORE FAKE LASHIES! jerrine would be so proud of me. hahaha. hong min crashed in my room cos e club was just opposite my dorm. hahaha, we were two bloody drunk girls. freaking hilarious. poor yangqi i tell you.

chor ming (((: we're both supposed to anger/wrath :p

tash!!! she's envy i'm wrath.

angela, me, nicole, charlotte, ayla (: all my darlings!

angela sweetieeee! i love this girl i tell you.

3 girls with the funny faces. joyce, hongmin & i.

kim! my co-organiser :D

ashraffff (:

part of e singsoc exco (: me, alison, chor ming, lynn, yangqi, joyce & natasha.

angela MUACKS.

we're hip djs :p joyce, hongmin, alison, tag, me & lynn.


sexy sexy kaylene. LUST :D

dawn & nee (:

ella & jasmine! haha. ucl girls.

guan sin! :D


rachel (:

chih chwen, jerald & i. seniors (:

partyyyyy!

b52 shots (: YUMMYYYY!


paul, me, angela, alvin, lynn & zaoyang! haha.


kenneth!!! haha, he looks mighty stoned here :p

hong min as LUST (:

party sceneeee (:

yang meh mehhh! hahaha.

tiankai! lovely surprise to see him there ((:

yangqi ((((: he was a total sweetheart last night. brought this very drunk girl home. looked after me. entertained me. picked me up from e floor MANY MANY TIMES. cos i kept falling down, from e chair and i couldn't even stand straight. hahaha. he was trying desperately to keep me upright :p and then he saw me at my most unglam. grumbles. this friend cannot lose alr. knows way too much embarrassing things about me. hahaha.

alrighty, that's all for now (: TATA!